If you’ve ever felt an invisible drain around a woman—whether she’s a family member, coworker, or part of your circle—yet everyone else sees her as sweet, spiritual, or strong, you’re not alone. Some women project charm outwardly while cultivating subtle chaos behind closed doors. This piece is for those who sense something is off but can’t quite explain it, especially when guilt or obligation forces you to stay connected. By exploring the ancient Indian lens of ‘Alakshmi’ and the modern psychology of narcissistic women, you’ll gain the clarity to identify energetic red flags early, set protective boundaries, and regain your emotional footing—even when cutting contact isn’t an option.

INTRODUCTION – When Something Feels Off

You’re sitting across from her—maybe at a family gathering, in a meeting, or during a casual chat—and everything seems fine. Her words are polite, her gestures well-timed, even affectionate. She’s known to be supportive, spiritual, maybe even admired in your community. Yet deep inside, something feels off. It’s hard to explain. You find yourself subtly drained after interactions, second-guessing your reactions, or even feeling small, guilty, or unsettled without knowing why.

If this resonates with you, you’re not imagining things. Some women carry an energy that is quietly corrosive, even while their outer appearance seems perfectly polished. They may play the victim, the hero, or the wise elder—but the reality you experience with them is far from nurturing. Often, they rely on performance: kindness in public, manipulation in private. Their energy doesn’t build anything around them; instead, it drains, distorts, and destroys in ways that are hard to pinpoint—until it’s too late.

This isn’t about blaming women, shaming aging, or denying female pain. It’s about naming a shadowy force that has existed in spiritual traditions across the world—including ancient Indian wisdom—as Alakshmi, the dark counterpart of Lakshmi, the goddess of abundance and harmony. While Lakshmi represents radiance, nourishment, fertility, and grace, Alakshmi symbolizes disorder, deprivation, envy, and decay. Importantly, they are not enemies but dual aspects of the same cosmic principle: creation and destruction, abundance and lack.

Modern psychology offers its own lens: terms like narcissism, covert abuse, flying monkeys, and toxic maternal archetypes mirror the ancient depictions of feminine shadow energy. They describe the same phenomena in contemporary language—subtle manipulation, self-centeredness disguised as service, and emotional weaponry that leaves others confused, guilty, or emotionally dependent.

Whether this woman is your mother, boss, friend, or spiritual guide, and whether walking away is an option or not, understanding her behavior is the first step to protecting your emotional well-being. By naming the energy, we loosen its grip. By understanding its patterns, we prepare ourselves. And by acting with clarity and boundaries, we can navigate such relationships—sometimes by stepping away, and sometimes by learning how not to get pulled in.

SECTION I – Who is Alakshmi?

A. Alakshmi in Indian Thought

In Indian cosmology, Alakshmi emerges alongside her radiant twin, Lakshmi, from the mythic Samudra Manthan—the churning of the cosmic ocean. This event, deeply symbolic, tells us that creation yields both gifts and shadows. Just as wealth, beauty, and grace arise (Lakshmi), so too do their counterparts—lack, envy, and disorder (Alakshmi). They are not enemies, but complements. Where Lakshmi blesses, Alakshmi warns. Where Lakshmi builds, Alakshmi reveals what is unsustainable.

Alakshmi is not inherently evil. She plays a role in balancing excess, checking hollow abundance, and revealing truth in disguise. Her arrival signals something deeper is off: a misalignment, an indulgence, a toxicity that needs addressing. Ancient seers recognized that too much sweetness spoils the vessel. Alakshmi, in this sense, is corrective—not demonic.

She especially arises in:

• Times of Excessive Indulgence – When comfort turns to complacency, or materialism overtakes dharma, she returns to bring austerity, conflict, or loss—forcing growth or realignment.

• Toxic Environments – Dysfunctional systems attract her. She does not create the toxicity but thrives in it. Like mold in damp corners, her presence exposes what needs cleansing.

• Energetic Vulnerability – In people lacking clarity, strength, or emotional boundaries, she can feed off confusion, guilt, and resentment. This is where she becomes personally harmful—especially when embodied by individuals.

Understanding Alakshmi’s nature empowers us. She is not to be feared but seen clearly. If unrecognized, her influence grows in the shadows. When acknowledged, she can be managed—and even transmuted.

B. Symbolic Qualities

Alakshmi appears in many forms, both literal and metaphorical. In ancient iconography, she is described as an old, haggard woman, riding a broken cart, walking through dry fields, speaking with harsh, bitter words. She is associated with jealousy, greed, quarrels, and depletion. She enters homes through dirt, negativity, and conflict.

Her symbols are unmistakable:

• Broken Cart – Progress that collapses under false weight; unsustainable ambition.

• Dry Land – Emotional barrenness, inability to nurture or regenerate.

• Harsh Speech – Truth twisted into weaponry; sweetness used to manipulate.

• Starving Old Woman – Insatiability; emotional hunger disguised as self-sacrifice.

• Jealousy and Unrest – Chronic dissatisfaction masked as caring or concern.

Today, she may appear in individuals—especially women—who wear the mask of virtue, helpfulness, or suffering, but leave you emotionally off-balance. You may feel guilty without cause, mentally foggy, or socially isolated after prolonged contact. Her power lies in subtlety—she can be the nurturer, the victim, the saint. But her energy consumes rather than nourishes.

To recognize Alakshmi energy is to understand that not all that glitters is Lakshmi. Some charm carries depletion. And sometimes, protecting your peace means knowing when sweetness has a bitter core.

SECTION II – The Psychology of ‘Alakshmi Energy’

A. What Alakshmi Feels Like in Real Life

Alakshmi energy is rarely obvious in the beginning. It arrives wrapped in charm, wrapped in care, even in allure. These individuals often present themselves with intensity, poise, and a deep sense of entitlement—though not always openly expressed. You may initially feel drawn in, admired, even lucky to be chosen as their friend, mentee, supporter, or confidante.

In the short term, these individuals can be magnetic:

• They exude confidence and superiority, often masked as helpful advice or moral guidance.

• Their presence may come with an unspoken message: “You owe me”, whether for their emotional labor, social inclusion, or past ‘kindness.’

• They can seem insightful or powerful, but their energy has a dominating edge—they set the emotional tone, you adjust to them.

But over time, the effects of this energy become clear. It doesn’t nourish; it drains.

In the long term, you may notice:

• Subtle fatigue: Emotional exhaustion that grows with every encounter.

• Guilt and confusion: You can’t quite explain why you feel bad, but somehow, you always do after interacting with them.

• Shrinking self-worth: Your confidence begins to erode; you start to question your instincts, doubt your boundaries.

• Hyper-vigilance: You’re constantly self-editing, walking on eggshells, afraid to offend, challenge, or outshine them.

This is the true signature of Alakshmi energy—it robs from the inside out, often while appearing generous or pained on the outside. It doesn’t strike loudly, but corrodes subtly.

B. Cultural Masking of Narcissistic Women

One reason Alakshmi energy is so difficult to identify is that it expertly mimics virtue, especially within cultural and social norms. Narcissistic women, particularly those influenced by Alakshmi archetypes, tend to shape-shift based on what their environment values most in a woman.

They don’t present as villains. They present as victims, saints, or saviors—people others are inclined to defend.

This phenomenon is highly culturally specific. In each setting, these women learn what “good” looks like—and they embody it just enough to deflect suspicion while continuing to manipulate those closest to them.

Traditional Settings

• The Sacrificing Mother or Wife: She suffers endlessly for her family but wields that suffering like a weapon. Her children or spouse feel indebted, emotionally suffocated, and never “good enough,” no matter what they do.

• The Respectable Victim: She invites sympathy while quietly sowing division—especially between those who might otherwise challenge her narrative.

Modern Spaces

• The Woke or Empowered Woman: She speaks the language of healing and boundaries while ignoring yours. Uses social justice rhetoric to control, not to liberate.

• The Spiritual Mask: Always “sending light and love,” but gaslights under the surface. Belittles others using spiritual superiority.

• The Boss-Lady Persona: She demands loyalty and praise, punishes dissent, and expects emotional labor masked as team spirit or sisterhood.

What makes such women difficult to confront is that they appear to be what society celebrates. To speak against them can make you look jealous, ungrateful, or regressive.

Understanding this adaptive masking is crucial. Alakshmi doesn’t walk in wearing a crown of thorns or bearing claws. She walks in as the person everyone applauds—while you quietly unravel behind the scenes.

SECTION III – Red Flags: How Alakshmi Energy Shows Up

The Alakshmi archetype does not announce herself with thunder and drama—at least, not at first. Her presence begins as a feeling—something off. The discomfort you can’t name, the energy that unsettles but hides behind charm, pity, or power. Recognizing the signs early is essential if you want to protect your energy, peace, and clarity. Here’s how this energy begins to surface.

A. Personality Traits

These women often embody traits that on the surface seem like confidence, care, or authority—but are driven by lack, envy, and need for control. Some key personality signs include:

• Deep jealousy disguised as concern: She may advise you not to take a risk or dim your light “for your own good,” when in fact, your growth threatens her sense of superiority.

• Competitiveness with younger or more radiant women: There is subtle undermining, dismissive humor, or criticism masked as mentorship. This often appears in female-dominated spaces or families.

• Constant need for admiration and attention: She orchestrates situations that make her the center of praise or sympathy. This may involve performing emotional labor she later uses as leverage.

• Subtle tearing down of others under the pretense of “helping” or “caring”: She might “fix” your appearance, choices, or mindset while slyly eroding your self-esteem.

• Rewriting events to always make herself the victim: Conversations become distorted. Facts bend. Somehow, she’s always the one wronged—even when she initiated the conflict.

These traits rarely come all at once. They accumulate over time and intensify as your presence becomes emotionally or energetically valuable to her.

B. Common Tactics

Alakshmi energy doesn’t always operate through overt hostility. It thrives in manipulation, distortion, and psychological destabilization. Recognize these common patterns of behavior:

• Gaslighting: You begin to doubt your own memory or feelings. She insists, “I never said that,” or “You’re too sensitive,” or rewrites entire scenarios.

• Guilt-tripping and emotional blackmail: She uses your empathy against you. If you try to set a boundary, you’re met with hurt looks, silence, or stories of her suffering.

• Triangulation: She turns others against you subtly, often without them realizing it. By feeding different stories to different people, she controls the narrative and isolates you.

• Public charm, private cruelty: In public, she’s warm, fun, and generous. In private, she withholds affection, belittles, or undermines you. This dissonance makes it hard for others to believe you if you speak up.

• Playing the martyr while silently controlling: She talks about all she’s done for others—while ensuring everyone moves around her needs, moods, or manipulations.

These behaviors are not random. They are systematic ways of asserting dominance while keeping their image untarnished.

C. When the Mask Slips

No matter how skilled the performance, every mask eventually cracks. There are key moments when the illusion breaks—and these are your windows of clarity.

• Crisis reveals her real face: When she is denied control, rejected, or challenged, her behavior shifts. You might see disproportionate rage, passive aggression, or complete withdrawal.

• Loss of control leads to rage, blame, or coldness: When she can’t manipulate a situation or person, she may lash out, accuse others of betrayal, or create chaos to regain power.

• Her words and actions begin to contradict her image: She may preach love and light, but gossip viciously. She may advocate for empowerment, but sabotage others. These contradictions are cracks in the persona.

Witnessing these moments can feel shocking—but they offer truth. If you’ve been confused, drained, or self-doubting, this is where your clarity begins.

SECTION IV – ‘Flying Monkeys’: Her Silent Army

In myth, folklore, and modern psychology, powerful antagonists rarely operate alone. They are sustained by enablers—individuals who carry out their agendas, spread their narratives, or maintain their illusions. In the realm of narcissistic dynamics, these enablers are often called “flying monkeys.”

The term, borrowed from the winged minions of the Wicked Witch in The Wizard of Oz, describes people who carry out the narcissist’s emotional labor: gossiping, manipulating others on her behalf, invalidating your truth, or maintaining the illusion of her righteousness. In the context of Alakshmi energy, these “monkeys” are more than passive enablers—they are minions to malice, willing or unaware, who reinforce dysfunction.

A. Who Are These ‘Flying Monkeys’?

Flying monkeys are not always loyal followers. Often, they’re a strange coalition of people connected by self-interest, fear, or emotional weakness. You may find them in families, social circles, or workplaces—people who:

• Don’t even like her personally, but support her because it’s socially easier than confronting the truth.

• Benefit from her influence, be it social status, favors, gifts, or indirect access to power.

• Are bound by social or familial obligations, especially in hierarchical cultures where age, gender, or roles grant automatic reverence.

• Secretly want to go against you—but lacked the confidence to do so until she gave them a narrative or excuse.

• Fear her wrath, preferring to stay in her good graces than risk being her next target.

• Have personal agendas that align with hers temporarily. They may be competitive, insecure, or opportunistic—and use her drama as a cover for their own motives.

Think of Maleficent’s army of shapeless goblins—bumbling yet dangerous when sent with orders. These minions don’t act on virtue. They move on convenience, cowardice, and complicity.

B. How Flying Monkeys Operate

The flying monkeys do the narcissist’s dirty work—sometimes with enthusiasm, other times out of obligation. Their tools include:

• Gossip and whisper campaigns: They repeat her version of events, casting doubt on your character, intentions, or credibility.

• Social triangulation: They insert themselves into your relationships, creating rifts, subtle judgment, or emotional tension.

• Invalidation of your experience: “She’s not that bad,” “You’re overreacting,” “She’s done so much for you.”

• Passive-aggressive behaviors: Coldness, exclusion, or vague hostility disguised as neutrality.

• Monitoring and reporting: They act as her eyes and ears, feeding her information about your moves, words, or changes in demeanor.

You may not even realize they’re involved until patterns emerge. The smiling co-worker who suddenly turns cold. The family member who sides with her, even after knowing her history. The friend who keeps saying “I don’t want to take sides” while enabling her narrative.

C. What to Do When You Spot Them

Dealing with flying monkeys is emotionally taxing—because they add a layer of betrayal to an already complex situation. Here’s what you can do:

• Don’t waste time convincing them: If someone needs proof of her toxicity, they’re either not ready—or not willing—to see the truth.

• Limit information and access: Assume anything you say will be repeated or distorted. Share only what you’re comfortable being broadcasted.

• Hold your integrity: Stay centered. Their opinions don’t define your truth. Don’t fall into reactive drama or ego games.

• Identify silent allies: In every group, there are quiet observers who sense the truth. Find them—not to gossip, but for grounding support.

• Expect confusion: It’s painful when people you trust enable her. Allow yourself to grieve that. But don’t internalize it as your failure.

In energetic terms, flying monkeys are not just people—they are extensions of Alakshmi’s field. They act as echo chambers for chaos, illusion, and imbalance. You cannot always escape them, but you can learn not to feed them with your energy.

SECTION V – Mythological and Cultural Examples

Understanding Alakshmi energy becomes clearer when we examine archetypes—characters who personify complex psychological patterns across time and culture. These figures may appear in sacred stories or modern films, but they mirror the same essence: feminine energy gone awry. Whether subtle or overt, they manipulate, control, or drain others under the veil of nurturing, entitlement, or empowerment.

A. Ancient Indian Rakshasis: Lessons from Myth

Indian mythology doesn’t shy away from depicting the dark feminine. Rakshasis (demonesses) serve as cautionary embodiments of unchecked desire, manipulation, and distortion of dharma (righteous order). While not always pure evil, their energy requires discernment and management—just like Alakshmi.

1. Putana – Poison Wrapped in Care

In the Bhagavata Purana, Putana disguises herself as a beautiful woman to breastfeed baby Krishna. But her milk is laced with poison. She pretends to nurture, but her intent is destruction.

Modern Parallel: The colleague who praises your work to your face but sabotages you behind your back. The family member who “loves” you but constantly diminishes your self-worth.

Lesson: Not all nurturing is life-giving. Energy must be felt, not just seen.

2. Surpanakha – Entitlement Turned Rage

Ravana’s sister, Surpanakha, demands love from Lord Rama and is humiliated when rejected. Her desire quickly mutates into violence—she attacks Sita and provokes a war.

Modern Parallel: A woman who feels entitled to your attention, respect, or emotional investment—and becomes toxic when denied.

Lesson: Entitlement disguised as affection turns volatile when boundaries are enforced.

3. Tataka – Feminine Chaos Unrestrained

Once a beautiful yaksha, Tataka is cursed into rakshasi form and begins terrorizing sages. She disrupts harmony and spreads fear, until Rama defeats her in the forest.

Modern Parallel: The woman who thrives in environments of chaos—always in conflict, always spreading negativity.

Lesson: Unchecked bitterness and pain can transform nurturing into destructiveness.

B. Pop Culture Parallels: Familiar Faces, Familiar Energy

Even in Western media, stories echo the Alakshmi pattern—particularly through female villains masked in charm or victimhood.

1. Mother Gothel (Tangled) – Feeding on Innocence

Gothel keeps Rapunzel trapped under the illusion of love and safety, all while draining her youth-giving power. She uses manipulation, guilt, and false protection.

Energetic Signature: “I know what’s best for you,” while secretly taking from you.

2. Snow White’s Stepmother – Perfection Masked with Poison

Obsession with youth and beauty drives the Queen to eliminate Snow White. Her envy hides behind an elegant, regal facade—until the mask slips.

Energetic Signature: Competitive, image-obsessed, incapable of celebrating other women’s light.

3. Ursula (The Little Mermaid) – Transactional Traps

Ursula offers Ariel a deal that seems empowering but is laced with deception. She plays on Ariel’s desires and ends up capturing her voice—literally and symbolically.

Energetic Signature: “I’m here to help you succeed,” but the cost is your identity, autonomy, or peace.

The Archetype Across Time

What links these women is not just malice—it’s emotional manipulation cloaked in something culturally palatable: motherhood, wisdom, independence, beauty, spiritual authority. Whether mythological rakshasis or animated villains, they warn us that energy matters more than appearance. Power without dharma becomes predatory.

These stories are not meant to instill fear—but discernment. They give us language, context, and validation for those inner alarms we’ve long ignored.

SECTION VI – Cutting Contact with an Alakshmi-Type

Letting go of someone who embodies Alakshmi energy can feel messy, confusing, and even guilt-inducing—especially if she has woven herself into your emotional or social world. But when your inner compass tells you, “Something is off,” it’s time to honor that truth. If you do have the option to walk away, it is not only your right—it’s your responsibility to your own well-being.

A. When You Can Walk Away

1. Trust Your Instincts
When you’re around an Alakshmi-type woman, something often feels energetically “off”—draining, agitating, confusing. Even if she appears polished, kind, or socially admired, your nervous system doesn’t lie. Trust it.

• You may feel exhausted after interactions

• You may second-guess yourself more around her

• You may sense jealousy, manipulation, or hidden competition under the surface

These are not “just in your head.” They are signs your boundaries are under subtle attack.

2. End Ties Cleanly and Quietly
If you realize that walking away is possible, don’t overexplain. You do not need her understanding or approval. She may bait you into explaining so she can manipulate your words later.

• Avoid long “closure” conversations

• Don’t get drawn into justifying your choice

• Use short, neutral statements like:

  “I’m focusing on different things right now.”
  “I’m taking space for my peace of mind.”

Your silence is your power.

3. Dodge the Traps: Drama, Guilt, and Faux-Apologies
She may not leave quietly. Expect tactics like:

• Performative apologies (“I’m sorry you feel that way.”)

• Guilt trips (“After everything I did for you…”)

• Public smear campaigns to make herself the victim

Do not engage. The more emotionally reactive you are, the more fuel you provide. Detach with dignity.

B. Energetic and Emotional Cleanup

Even after cutting physical ties, her energy may linger. Cleanse not just your environment, but your aura.

1.  Emotional Disengagement
The goal is to stop reacting—whether with rage, sadness, or longing for validation.

• Do not check her social media

• Avoid mutual gossip

• Don’t defend yourself—truth needs no performance

• Affirm: “I reclaim my energy. I no longer serve dysfunction.”

2. Rewire the Belief: “It Was Me”
Narcissistic women are masters of subtle blame-shifting. Even after they’re gone, you may carry:

• Guilt for leaving

• Confusion about your worth

• Shame for being “too sensitive”

Repeat this truth until it anchors:
“I was not the problem. I was the resource. Now, I stop feeding what doesn’t nourish me.”

SECTION VII – Managing Alakshmi Energy When You Can’t Leave

Not every Alakshmi-type woman can be removed from your life. She might be a family member, a boss, a senior colleague, or someone socially entwined with your daily reality. In such cases, the goal is not to fix her—but to fortify yourself. You manage her presence by managing your response, presence, and emotional access.

A. Protect Your Energy

When direct escape isn’t possible, minimize emotional access.

1. Limit Emotional Exposure
Avoid giving her insight into your fears, desires, or inner thoughts—she will likely weaponize them.

• Keep conversations short, neutral, and matter-of-fact

• Avoid emotional language or reactive tones

• Think like a diplomat: polite, professional, but uninvested

2. Don’t Seek Validation or Understanding
She will not “get” you—because her power depends on not getting you.

• Don’t expect empathy or accountability

• Let go of needing her to see your side

• Refrain from explaining yourself—clarity is for you, not her

3. Use the Grey Rock Method
Become as unengaging and unentertaining as a grey rock.

• Respond in non-reactive, bland ways

• Show no emotional high or low—just neutrality

• Withhold personal enthusiasm, frustration, or excitement

This protects your emotional fuel from being extracted.

B. Create Silent Boundaries

Boundaries don’t always have to be loud or confrontational. In environments where hierarchy, obligation, or visibility is high, quiet boundaries are powerful.

1. Say Less, Reveal Less
Information is power. Keep yours to yourself.

• Don’t overshare details about your plans, thoughts, or feelings

• Pause before responding—ask yourself, “Does this empower her or drain me?”

2. Retreat Emotionally, Not Just Physically
Even if you’re in the same room, you don’t have to be energetically available.

• Visualize a protective boundary around you

• Internally affirm: “I am not emotionally available for this dynamic.”

3. Fortify Your Own Circle
Isolation weakens you—community strengthens.

• Stay close to people who uplift and affirm your reality

• Create strong connections outside the toxic influence

4. Document Interactions (When Needed)
In work or legal family dynamics, documentation gives you security.

• Save texts, emails, and logs of significant conversations

• It’s not paranoia—it’s protection

C. Reclaim Your Peace

Alakshmi thrives where you’re energetically unstable. Daily practices that return you to yourself are not luxuries—they’re shields.

1. Practice Grounding Daily
Every day, return to a stable state that no one else controls.

• Walk in nature, touch the earth

• Use breathwork, prayer, or mantra chanting

• Anchor your body and mind into the present moment

2. Surround Yourself with Truth
You are not crazy. You are not too much. You are not to blame.

• Connect with people, books, or teachings that restore inner truth

• Keep reminders of who you are where you can see them

• Speak your truth to yourself—even if no one else listens

3. Invest in Inner Healing
Dealing with Alakshmi energy long-term causes deep energetic wounds. Prioritize healing.

• Therapy to untangle emotional manipulation

• Energy work to clean up your aura and nervous system

• Wisdom literature (Bhagavad Gita, Stoic texts, or spiritual teachings) to rebuild internal alignment